What's left is the crossing guard of truth

I've just gotten rid of the short description of this blog, because I've come to realise that it's a load of shit. I'm not actually sure what thoughts I've had, or am having, that can't be discarded. I'm not sure at all, why I've re-started this blog.

I'm not about to delete it. I'm not even about to finish up with it. I like having a blog. I like writing my blog and I like that a couple of people read it. And even make comments on it. What I'm not sure of, is why I need to put any of this out into the open.

I could just buy a journal and do that. It would virtually achieve the same objective; the need to write. As I've said before, I've tried to quit writing and have found it too hard to do. Yet, every day, I struggle for things to come up with; for things to write. This re-started blog is akin to a band you used to like who have gotten back together: I like you old stuff better than your new stuff.

This blog used to be good once. In my very humble opinion, it used to be very good. And it used to be easy. It got harder as the days went on but, I remember racing to one hundred posts and barely breaking a sweat. I write this blog at work, mostly, and I used to write two, sometimes three posts in a day and archive them, so I'd have something to post every day. Now, I sometimes panic when I think it's time to blog. Yes, I know I could just blog whenever I felt like it but, a blog is really a conversation, isn't it? And a one-sided conversation gets stale after a while. A blog needs life to grow. It needs updates for people to stay interested. You need to write to improve.

But does it all really matter? Would it matter if I got no more followers? Would it matter if I suddenly gained a hundred? No. Because all that matters is what I want out of it. And, the thing I think I want out of it most, is the push to keep writing.

And maybe, in the end, that's all we need our blogs for. To be forced to keep going. To have a reason improve.

To have a reason to not give up.

Hello world - it's me!!!!!

We have a program called 'Insight,' which is a Q&A type program that members of the public can go on and debate certain pertinent issues. It's on every Tuesday night and is hosted by the delightful Jenny Brocky. This Tuesday's program is, 'Are we breeding a generation of narcissists?'

Ummmm, what? Is there any debate on this? Human beings are narcissists. It's just much easier to be a narcissist in front of a bigger audience now. Hell, if they'd had Twitter, You tube etc when I was in high school, you bet your life I'd have been all over it. So would 90% of the people I went to school with. This generation is no more or less narcissistic than mine, it's just much easier to reach a wider audience.

I mean, this question is being asked by Jenny Brocky, who hosts a television program devoted to this single question. How narcissistic is that? Of course, they'll have school kids and others on proclaiming that they're not self-obsessed knobs, while being self-obsessed knobs. I mean, for God's sake, does anyone realise what narcissism means now? It's practically a non-existant term. EVERYONE IS IN LOVE WITH THEMSELVES, IT'S HOW WE SURVIVE.

And personally, I think it's great. I love the fact that it's easier to reach a wide audience. I love the fact that the Internet is full to the brim of some of the most inane shit you could ever come up with, because it means that, when you truly find something great, you still feel like you're part of an underground movement. You can still feel like you're part of something special, even if that thing suddenly takes off. It's kind of nice to have to sift through so much shit to get to the diamonds. But it's also great that people like me have an opportunity to put our thoughts out there and see what happens. I've always been an advocate of one in-all in. Why should it be only the privileged few who get heard? Why NOT everyone?

Of course, not everyone does get to be heard. For all the millions of people doing blogs, music, films, art etc; there are millions more who still don't have access to computers, phones etc. Hell, there are millions more who don't have access to electricity, water, food and shelter; let alone privileged things like computers. It's very much a rich country's concept, this 'are we breeding a generation of narcissists?'

Dare I say, it's very much a narcissistic country's question?